When I set out to come up with goals for the year, I was having trouble finding focus. I knew that I wanted goals that would push me to be a better version of myself, but beyond that, I had nothing. Some make lofty goals, in hopes that their life magically comes together, and things *happen*. I am guilty of this. Or, we make so many goals, that it is damn near impossible to put in the work to make them happen. I'm also guilty of this.
So this year, I decided to go with one word. Challenge. I thought for a long time about what I hope to achieve, and what is actually attainable, and challenge felt like the perfect word to get me there. I want to step out of comfort, and into discomfort. We cannot grow unless we push the boundaries. I have so many hopes and dreams that I desperately want to become reality, and without challenging myself, I know I will never get there.
Because I started writing this prior to taking any action, I wasn't quite sure what the challenges were going to be. I was open to finding out, but I wasn't truly sure how I would do it. Little did I know, the universe was working in my favor, and threw me right in.
In mid-January, I was set to go to Nashville for an oily networking event. Due to scheduling conflicts, and a last-minute illness (I missed you KC!), none of my oily friends were able to go. My immediate thought was, I should just hang out in Nashville, and skip the events. But my word for the year was fresh in my mind. Challenge (hesitantly) accepted. I went to a cocktail party terrified that I would be standing alone, in a room full of people who were friends. Little did I know I was not the only one there who was 'alone' and I quickly found that everyone there was a friend. Typically walking into a room full of (mostly) women there are some that are catty, some that might judge and even some that are flat out rude, but not here. This was a room full of people on their own oily journey, wanting to know about yours. Wanting to get to know you. No judgement. No backhanded comments. Just genuine people looking to make new friends and it was so freakin refreshing.
While there, listening to the speakers, I had so many a-ha moments. One of the notes I wrote was 'what if your goal is who you are becoming?' and it hit me like a ton of bricks. YES. Yearly goals might help propel you. Yearly words might help you get there too. But what if the goal is being authentically you day in and day out? What if the goal is really a lifelong journey to you. Always growing. Always pushing yourself to be the best version of yourself. It was one of those moments where you know you are exactly where you are supposed to be. That day reaffirmed my word for the year.
My next challenge was something that I have been considering for a while, but was hesitant to take the step forward. I reached out to a local brewery to secure a date that worked for them, made a little graphic in canva, and hit publish in a few local moms groups for 'Moms Night Out'. I didn't know if any of my friends would come. Heck, I didn't know if anyone would come at all. But I knew this was something that I needed. Working from home, you get lost in yourself, and then spending all my free time with my kids and husband, I wanted, I craved, time talking to other women in the same season of life.
Within a few hours, I had so many responses to my postings, so many emails to sort through, all positive thanking me for organizing and wanting to attend.
A few weeks later, at the first Moms Night Out, 35 people showed up, some with a friend, some not knowing anyone. We chatted, we ate, we drank, and overall, I think we all made a few friends. A month later, at the next Moms Night, we had fewer people show up, but still the same energy. Maybe I read it wrong, but at both events, it was like a collective sigh of, 'we needed this'. I now have the next 2 events on the books, and I want to continue expanding, growing, and enjoying the presence of other moms, because being a mom is the hardest job I've ever done. And knowing you are not alone on this journey, and that we all are just doing the very best we can, makes you feel a little better. A little less alone, and a little less like you are doing it wrong.
I have no idea what other challenges this year may bring, but I am carefully considering every opportunity that presents itself. And when I feel I am lacking something in my life, I am leaning into that. Sitting in that feeling of scarcity, and brainstorming solutions. Instead of ignoring these inadequacies, I am jumping in head first. Searching for the answer that I know lies within me. Before I would have buried these feelings deep below the surface, but I now know that the key to my happiness is right there in the center of the myself.
Challenge seemed very scary when I came up with it, but it is quickly turning out to be one of the greatest gifts I have given myself.
xo,
Mandi
P.S. I would LOVE for you to share your word for the year, of a goal you've given yourself this year. Let's encourage and support one another!
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